
I’m big on pushing myself. I never want to have regrets or be the person who settles.
Wouldn’t that be a horrible thing to have people stare at you with pity and say, “Awe she could’ve been so much more. Bless her heart!” (side note – “bless her heart” is a southern insult)
Because of this, I try to pursue every opportunity that comes my way.
When my sister awkwardly proposed the option of me applying to work at the same company as her, I immediately assumed there’s no way she’s serious. She must be joking. Every single thing about myself that eats me up on the inside immediately came to the forefront of my mind. You didn’t do well enough in college, you’re dyslexic, they’ll have such high expectations that you could never meet them, etc. Then the second wave ran through my head beginning with, you’re really going to follow her somewhere else and ending with, aren’t you ever going to be able to do something without her assistance, will you ever be more than just Rebekah’s sister?

Rebekah and I on a trip to Hershey Park to see the Christmas lights.
Some of these thoughts are valid concerns, some are damaging thoughts that haunt me, and some are a bit more complex. I decided to dive into why I felt all of these things.
Here’s my analysis of my thoughts:
“You didn’t do well enough in college”
Ok, my grades weren’t fantastic but they weren’t horrid. I goofed off my freshman year, but once I buckled down, I flourished in college. I was involved in a lot, while I was in college, and I tried to be the best across the board. I think my grades, especially within my specializations, reflect a person who worked hard and did her best. I also learned so much about life and made my long lasting friendships because of my extracurricular activities.
“You’re dyslexic”
After being diagnosed with dyslexia for almost 20 years, I really need to get new material to beat myself up with. Sure, it’s an endless struggle but I’ve learned how to learn and how to deal with it. I have my battles and sometimes I fail, but most of the time no one ever knows! It’s nothing to be ashamed of and certainly something I don’t hide. I have a hurdle that follows me around like a tiger waiting to attack but everybody has something that plagues them. Right??
“They’ll have such high expectations and you could never meet them”
My sister is amazing. I don’t tell her that often because it would immediately go to her head, but she freaking is! She is a learning machine! She puts in the work and her work reflects excellence. It’s something to aspire to.
The discouraging thing is trying to live up to what she does. Comparing myself to her started as a child and is something that I still struggle with. Some of her greatest strengths are my greatest weaknesses and I use that against myself. What I often forget is that she believes in me. She has seen me reach my goals by doing it my way. She understands better than anyone that I have to take my own way to learn things. When I apply myself and use some creativity in order to figure things out, I can create something to be proud of. Who knew that I could be great too? She knew. She’s always known.*
“You’re really going to follow her somewhere else?”
This has a bit to do with the nature of being a younger sibling, but for us, it has been a common occurrence. There are countless examples from growing up and going to college.** Yet in my job history, there are not many positions that she hasn’t been involved in. All of these experiences have turned out wonderfully. So, for me to use it as an excuse not to apply for a job is ridiculous.
“Aren’t you ever going to be able to do something without her assistance”
I call Rebekah when I can’t find something in the supermarket. We usually talk to each other throughout the day. She’s the stability that my dreams need. Someone like me needs someone like her in their life. This is silly. I need her and that is not a bad thing.
“Will you ever be more than just Rebekah’s sister?”
I don’t know how she feels about being my sister, but I kind of feel like I hit the jackpot. She’s done a lot of cool things and I’ve gotten the chance to witness it.

We were at an Old Dominion concert.
Until we are both dead, I am going to be introduced as, “Rebekah’s sister Liz”. It will make my future me’s life a lot easier if I get over being “just Rebekah’s sister”. So, to future me, “You’re welcome. I’m giving this up today to make your life easier.” As Rebekah continues to accomplish great things, I’m going to be happy for her, encourage her as she needs it, and enjoy the ride.



